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Archive for the “Personal” Category

I could tell it wouldn’t be long.  It’s barely a month to go, and somehow, in some sentimental way, I’m brooding over it.  I know, I know, to some, it’s not such a big deal.  But to me, for the past few years, a year added to my age means an old phase ending and a new phase beginning.  And most of all, the coming one is crucial because I’d be leaving my teenage years and saying hello to my twenty-something years.  Blech.  Even thinking about it makes me puke.

In any case, just like any other birthday, of course I welcome it with joy and optimism.  Likewise, I’m bringing back something I’ve done on my 18th birthday to which many people responded to.  And, guys, it’s my 20th birthday!  So let’s make it special!  Here’s my partial wishlist for all of you well-wishers out there.  Wehehe.  Ang kapal ko!  =P (more…)

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People who know me know that on my spare time (yes, the little of it), I like to spend time watching movies (either with a companion or by myself through Joaqs).  I’m a suki of torrent sites out there, as well as cinemas whenever a new movie comes out.  But most of the time I busy myself watching movies at the apartment, just by the bed or by the study table, absent the more preferred surround sound or home theater lighting, and just confine myself with me and Joaqs (my laptop), plus a headset.

Lately, the movies I tend to watch were preoccupied with the idea that beneath the fabrics of this universe lies someone–or some thing–who/that writes the grand story of our lives.  There’s Mrs. Dalloway and Virginia Woolf in The Hours, Truman Burkman and Christof in The Truman Show, Harold Crick and Karen Eiffel in Stranger than Fiction, and Horton and the Who(s) in Horton hears a Who (although I haven’t finished this one yet). These movies talk about the eternal debate between the pre-destination of Man and his power to change that destiny, as well as the master pen-writer who weaves stories into our lives as he/it goes. (more…)

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People are overjoyed by firsts.  First hugs, first kisses, first dates, first haircut, first solid food, and the list goes on.  Of course, who wouldn’t be happy with a monumental first, right?

I know I love firsts too but there are certain kinds of firsts I don’t like: first to report, first to dive, first to introduce, first to talk, first to perform, etc.  Haha.  You guessed it.  I hate it when I’m first to take on anything risky, or anything I’ve never done before.  Of course, I know I should be confident, but sometimes my fears and qualms get the best of me.

Just yesterday, I experienced another first: first discussion leader for the sem.  In our ethics class, the professor picks a name from a bag every meeting who will lead the class in the discussion of the homework or of the case assigned.  It’s just so bewildering that even after praying in my mind, crossing my fingers and making a subtle sign of the cross, my name was picked out of the twenty or so names inside the ziploc bag.  Ugh.  I panicked.  It would’ve been alright to be second because at least by then I’d have an idea how to conduct the discussion.  But being the first, I was clueless as to what I had to do.  Add to that my impeccable (dis)ability at speaking in front, which often leads to a lot of stammering and stuttering. I don’t like speaking that much.  I’m a nervous speaker.  Not knowing what to do, I simply followed the flow of the assignment (comparison of two codes of ethics) and thank God for the people who participated (Jeff, Claire, Marj and Dana, I owe you lots), the discussion went a bit fine.

So yeah, even if I was the “sacrificial lamb,” at least the prof gave me a bit of a leeway and understanding, given that I didn’t know much of what to do.

Oh well, being the first can be frightening, but at least I’m already done with being the discussion leader.  Heh.

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Most of us are, at one point or another, disturbed by that one unnerving question that attempts to define our very existence: what am I doing in this world? To some, the answer seemingly comes quick as a passing day, but to most of us who are oblivious to the mysteries of the world, the answer doesn’t come at once, or sometimes, doesn’t come at all. (more…)

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I believe this picture best represents the “ultimate emo” persona. What’s more emo than an unshaved, desolate Jude (from Across the Universe) staring at a row of pinned-up strawberries on canvas, bleeding endless pints of red, imagining each and every piece of fruit as a morsel of his own heart? (a slight mistake: do strawberries bleed red juice, anyway?)

No, I’m perfectly fine. Life is perfectly fine. Actually, it can’t be any more fine than this. But there’s just this stinging feeling I can’t seem to take away (and no, it’s not even the itsy-bitsy trivial problem I had last night). I don’t know. Sometimes this is why a period of emo-ness is quite difficult to handle: coz it’s difficult to explain where it’s coming from. It’s hard to comprehend, that’s why it’s hard to find a solution for it. Just like a wart that unsuspectingly grows on some weird part of your body and unwittingly goes away in a few months, sans the presence of any kind of cure. Sucks, no?

What’s funny (and a bit weird) about this “phase,” if you may call it that, is that I’m not alone in this struggle. There’s Ate Eliza, who can’t seem to figure out what’s wrong with her either. There’s my cousin, Annalyn. There’s Annie, who just came back to school two months after graduating. And a whole slew of other people. So tell me, what’s this, a global epidemic?

In any case, I hope this “phase” ends soon. Sumasakit lang ang ulo ko eh.

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AJ has forever been raving about this certain chocolate that tastes so good. The best thing about it is that it’s available almost anywhere (in Mini Stop outlets) and that it’s manufactured locally. Truly one product to be proud of, if we believe AJ’s story. Heh.

Piqued with curiosity by reading AJ’s article on the Goya Dark Mint Chocolate, I immediately set out hunting for this tasty catch. When we passed by Mini Stop in DM Rivera Street near Sts. Peter and Paul Parish in Makati, I didn’t hesitate and bought myself a pack.

When I finally found a pack of the chocolate (the last one at that), I quickly grabbed it and headed for the counter to pay. Holding it in my hand, it felt as if it didn’t even contain anything. Product of the packaging, I thought to myself.

When I got back at the car and opened the box, however, I found out something else about this chocolate: (more…)

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I’d like to thank the person who thought of saving a day from a busy year for us to be able to show appreciation and gratitude to one of the most important persons in our entire existence: our moms. So, to whoever you are and wherever you may be, thank you a bajillion lot!

But come to think of it, moms must be so underappreciated that we have to set aside a special day devoted entirely for them, no? I think that says something. We need to appreciate our moms more, because they have one of the thankless and hardest jobs in this world: raising us from our bratty toddler years to our rebellious teen years and onto the day they let us fly on our own. Sigh… I just can’t help but wonder what this world would be without moms? It must be one disastrous place, even more of a wreck than my apartment room right now without my mom telling me to clean it. Heh.

So, to all the moms out there, Happy Mother’s Day! As for my mom… here’s a little something I prepared for her. I love you mom! =)

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So yeah, I practically lost my sense of time.  And with it goes my sense of date, of moment, of anything remotely close to any temporal concept ever known to man.  Good thing my sense of space is still intact, otherwise I’d be traveling through time and back and may just end up somewhere in the World History I wouldn’t wanna be in.

Blah, I tend to blabber, I know.  Anyways, I’m just posting a quick update to let you all know I’m still alive.  I’m currently undergoing on the job training over at Philippine Daily Inquirer right now, and the internship blog I’ve set up for it is the one that’s more updated (or, come to think of it, it’s somehow updated.  LOLz).

So what else are the highlights of recent weeks?  Gawrsh, April’s flying by the window already, and sooner than we think, May’s happily waiting by the door with all its happy, shiny teeth full of newly-blossomed flowers.  Gah.  Time flies by so fast, that’s why I have any concept of time anymore.  Been sleeping 4-hour nights lately, waking up at the most ungodly of hours, aggravated by the fact that it’s freaking summer and I’m not getting that much sleep.  So on weekends I try to get back on my sleep (or uber lack of it), which basically makes my body clock go haywire and by Monday I end up experiencing major backlashes again.  SO YEAH, DEATH TO THIS ROUTINE.  Good thing I’d soon be finishing.

So, that’d be all for now.  I’m getting hooked on American Idol lately, some musicals from outer space, Counter-Strike and Grand Theft Auto, and I just can’t let this summer pass without touching a grain of sand, feeling the sun on my skin and breathing in fresh, cold, flowery air.  So yeah, just guess where I’m headed.  Hopefully every plan this summer will push through.

How’s your summer so far?

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The customary sem-ender assessment post should’ve been at hand, but I just can’t seem to bring myself to analyze the entire sem that transpired. It’s just so major to be put down into words which, I think, will not suffice for the intensity of the past semester. One word fits, however, and that’s the title of my previous post: Haggard.

I believe I haven’t been that stressed in my entire life. I haven’t had two-hour shuteyes either. I haven’t downed three cups-full of coffee in just one night. I haven’t been so mad. I haven’t been so disappointed. I haven’t been so frustrated. Frankly, I do have mixed feelings about this sem.

That’s why I want to put it to a close. Leave it behind. Give closure to things and move on to broader horizons. I don’t want to look back at the sem that just passed anymore, because it only evokes a lot of feelings and emotions that I don’t want to linger for long. So this is why the customary post-semester post won’t be a reality this time. Instead, let’s all look forward… and beyond.

Kumi was right. This’ll be our last summer as carefree students without a care in the world. Next summer, it’ll be all about the real world (not unless we don’t graduate on time, which shouldn’t happen to me AT ALL COSTS). So to commemorate this last summer in our student lives, we’ll be starting PROJECT SUMMER. Details shall follow soon. Watch this space. 😉

This has been my wallpaper for the sem

I also want to be as productive as possible this summer. Aside from my internship at Philippine Daily Inquirer (150 hours of Police Beat Haggardness–everybody now: “Stress!”), I want to do things that’ll enrich me personally. I want to experience new things, and these are some of the things that are lined up for me this summer:

  • PROJECT SUMMER with friends, whatever and wherever that may lead us
  • Learn how to do a WordPress theme, courtesy of Shari‘s prodding
  • Go to Baguio for the FIRST TIME EVER (Haggard, I hope it pushes through…)
  • Participate in The Blog Awards Challenge to get back my writing groove
  • Ask to contribute to another magazine (a prof of mine is asking me to write for this new street magazine)
  • Go places! Road Trips! Hikings! Vacationing! Anything that can help me relax and reclaim the life stolen by the past semester

Those are the things I could think of right now. I really want this to be a very productive summer for me, this being the last fun summer I can ever have.

Hope you’ll have a fun summer ahead of you! Right now, I’m just glad that the past sem’s off my back. It just dragged on and on and on that it’s such a relief that it’s finally over. Honestly speaking, it hasn’t sank into me yet. I hope it does soon, for I only have a week’s worth of vacation ’til I start internship.

Oh well. The next few entries, I hope, will be more insightful. I plan on posting my misadventures during internship at the risk of creeping my readers out. You’ll see. Watch out for it. :evil laughter:

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The next several weeks are going to be hectic, in a word.  Haggard, if you may.  That’s the main reason why I haven’t been blogging lately.  And I can’t promise myself to blog often during those hectic days.  Oh well, that’s the life of a student.  Furthermore, my UP Planner has become my trusty chronicler lately, so whatever I want to say, I put there.

In any case, this serves as an advance warning for the coming whiplash.  See you after the long lull.  =)  Hope you’re still there.

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Think Before You Blog

So yeah, basically, once again, just like before, I bailed out on my blogging. Bleh. Hehe. I just couldn’t stand seeing that last entry over and over again for the past week so that basically pressured me to blog tonight. Haha. And what I’m gonna post isn’t very sensical, but a friend interviewed me about blogging for her Media Ethics class, and I’m posting my answers here. Yay, how fun! Now go read. (more…)

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So yeah, since weekend wrap-ups, round-ups and syntheses are the latest fad online, I jump in the bandwagon and provide you with my own version of a weekend recap. And this being a personal blog, I intend to do this in the old-fashioned, journalese, web-log kind of way, the one we got used to when blogging was just in its nurturing stage.

paratrooper.jpg

To tell you honestly I missed blogging by just simply narrating what transpired in my day, so that’s why I’m doing this. I don’t know why I keep on trying to be profound in coming up with “articles” instead of just “entries” for this blog. So suffice to say, this segment will attempt to fill that void.

Let’s do this, guys! (more…)

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561765.jpgAs most of my Twitter followers know, I lost my precious wallet the night I went home from the Trinoma Bloggers’ Food Tour. Of course the apparent conclusion that the heavens have smitten me because of being such a glutton during the tour rang up. But no matter how I looked at it, I could not hide the frustration and, quite pathetically, the pain that something so precious to me got lost.

I don’t quite know what happened. I may have dropped it in the jeepney on the way home. It may have slipped out of my jeans’ back pocket. Somebody may have stolen it. I don’t know. What I do know is that it’s gone.

Of course, had this been any other precious thing, I wouldn’t sound this pathetic. It didn’t have that much money in it, just enough to make me survive for a day or two. It wasn’t such an expensive wallet either, it’s just a Girbaud synthetic leather wallet given to me by a dear friend around three or four years ago. (more…)

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Sans the fireworks and firecrackers that marked the birth of a New Year past 12 midnight last night, it is now January 1, the first day of the year, and it is but apt to look ahead and explore the vast blank canvas we are once again tasked to paint with little colors of our lives.

new year

But before proceeding with the future ahead of us (no matter how bright or dim it may be), it is also but apt to look back into the masterpiece we have painted the previous year–all the strokes, the dashes, the lights and the shadows, the uphills and downhills, the light and dark moments–they’re all worth reminiscing and worth learning from, especially because they will be pivotal in drawing the next future for us.

And as per tradition of my blogs for the past couple of years, I’ll have to name this year with something that describes its entirety. Last 2004 I named it The Year of Discovery, 2005 The Year of the Two, 2006 The Year of the Change. 2007, I believe, would be aptly named The Year of the Risk–for all the times I had to leave my comfort zone, for all the time I had to take on a challenge, for all the times I took a leap of faith (and times I fell, and times I rose from falling), and for all the times I took a chance… this year, it was definitely worth taking risks, for I’ve reaped many rewards because of it.

So come journey back with me and forever remember the significant moments of my life this year.

(more…)

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It’s kind of ironic and fortunate at the same time that it comes raining down quite heavily right after Christmas Day.  But somehow it showed and reinforced how gloomy the atmosphere is.  Then again it’s the perfect atmosphere for me to write this Christmas post while sipping a hot Swiss Miss Choco sitting comfortably here at our dinner table, with “Ever Ever After” by Carrie Underwood playing in the background.  Somehow I’m imagining sitting in one of the couches and Starbucks, trying best as I could to drown out the noise and let the world hear my fingers speak.

xmas

So, popping the big question this time around, How did my Christmas go?  Surely it beats the other Christmases I’ve experienced, and for a number of reasons.  But I’d have to note that I really didn’t feel Christmas until a few hours before the clock struck twelve, as I’ve mentioned in my previous post.  There was not a deluge of text messages greeting me Merry Christmas unlike the previous years, but then I guess that’s an after-effect of the cruel system Globe imposes on its subscribers during this peak season.

But I’d also like to note how some other people didn’t feel the Christmas “spirit” as well.  I’ve been to several blogs saying the same things and asking the same questions I did.  Multiply blog posts consisted of people saying they didn’t feel the Christmas that much this year.  Is it the world?  Is it the Philippines?  Or is it just us getting older by the day, forgetting to “feel” Christmas because of all the realities we’ve come to deal with?  Quite honestly I grapple for an answer but couldn’t find one, so I guess I’ll just leave it at that.

(more…)

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