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We all have made and read our own reviews of Twilight, the movie about a teen vampire falling in love with an ordinary vampire-looking girl (hek hek).  Some of the reviews I’ve read have nothing but praises on the film, while most–probably the majority–think Twilight deserves a nail in the coffin.  Or more.

Now that most of the dust has settled, everyone’s baking their cake and serving it in minute amounts.  Twilight’s story is so simple most people seem to think they can do a better job than Catherine Hardwicke, taking matters into their own hands.

The question now is not how good or bad these renditions are, but, more appropriately: just how many permutations and renditions of Twilight out there?  Here’s two I found out:

The Puppet Version

The James doll is uncannily similar to the one in the movie, don’t you think?  I just died at 1:33!  Hahahaha.

The Filipino Version

kasi pare ganito daw yun. may isa daw babae na hot daw pare. pero maputla siya kasi hindi siya inalagaan ng nanay niya pare. tapos pare emo daw siya kasi nga daw hindi siya mahal ng mundo at para siyang patay na bata na galit sa mundo. tapos pare, lumipat daw siya ng tirahan kasi daw masyado daw siyang emo para sa luma niyang tirahan. sabi niya sa nanay niya “tangina mo nay gusto ko lumipat kay tay”. tangina pare hindi nagalit nanay niya. sabi lang ng nanay niya “tangina mo pare wag ka magmura”.

so lumipat siya sa tatay niya di ba? pagkarating niya dun sabi niya, “tangina erpat bakit maulan dito?” sabi ng erpat niya “gago “bur” months na! malamig na tangena”. so nagtaka yung babaeng simula ngayon ay tatawagin na lang nating “babaeng maputla at emo”.

so pumasok siya sa school di ba? binigyan siya ng truck ng tatay niya pare. sabi ng tatay niya “tangina mo sa’yo na tong truck ko”. sabi niya “salamat tay”.

pagkarating niyang school tsong, may nakita siyang lalaking mukhang bangkay pero pogi. sakto. pogi pero mukhang bangkay. sabi ni babaeng maputla at emo “hot pare”.

nung chem lab na ni babaeng maputla at emo, natagpuan niyang lab partner niya yung poging bangkay. so nung tinignan siya nung poging bangaky, ang asim ng mukha nito. mukhang nandiri ata kay babaeng maputla at emo.

sabi ni poging bangkay “tangina mo”. sabi ni babaeng maputla at emo “tangina KA”. sabi ni poging bangkay “tangina NIYA oh *tumuro sa teacher nila*”. sabi ni babaeng maputla at emo “oo nga noh. TANGINA MO”. sabi ni poging bangkay “tangina mo gago bampira ako”. tapos naghubad siya ng damit at kumintab ang katawan niya kasi linagyan niya ng glitters ang abs niya kasi tigas siya at ganun na ang mga tigas ngayon na nagpupuntang emba.

so pare na in love si babaeng maputla at emo kay poging bangkay. si poging bangkay naman sige lang kasi sex din daw yun. so ayun. angshweet shweet nila.

“eow poh… ahihihihi”

“bebe mwahugz,….. ^^,”

so tapos nun nagpunta sila sa damuhan kasi…. alam mo na. tapos sabi ni poging bangkay “ikaw na buhay ko ngayon” sabi ni babaeng maputla at emo “tangina mo gago patay ka na”. sabi ni poging bangkay “TANGINA KA”.

tapos nagsex sila

so basically pare yun lang yung mga importanteng nangyari sa buong storya. intense noh? kaya pala nahhook lahat ng tao.

This one really pulled my funny bone, I was laughing so hard I don’t think I’d need fat burners to lose pounds after all that laughing.

Do you know of any other Twilight “versions” out there?  Hehehe.  These things are such fun to watch.  Oh, and my take on Twilight?  I don’t tend to put it on a high horse, so it’s safe to say that I really liked it.  😉


26 Responses to “Twilight Madness!”
  1. Micah says:

    On the puppet version: ROFLMAO!!!!!!
    (Shet I haven’t seen the human version…)

  2. JM says:

    HAHAHA DIBAAA. Ay shet oo nga pala di mo pa napapanood ang human version! Well, safe to say, gayang-gaya siya! Hahahaha. =))

  3. Micah says:

    Tawa rin ako nang tawa sa kanto version (which I read before watching the vid), pero juice meh, WINNARRRRR nang bonggang bongga ang video!!!

  4. Toilet Thoughts says:

    Haha. This is soo cool. Thanks for sharing.

    At pamatay ung tagalog version. Sino gumawa nung tagalog?

  5. JM says:

    I’m not really sure, I just got it from multiply. =P

  6. eliza says:

    GUSTO KO YUNG PUPPET VERSION SABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOG

    (dance)

  7. guest says:

    Grab a copy of the latest US weekly magazine special entitled “ The sexy stars of twilight.” It has 7 pull out posters, 140 photos and behind the scene features from the upcoming New Moon movie. Order now and take advantage of the 20% discount. Call emeraldheadway at 6474744 local 152 or 138 for reservations or you can send an email @ emeraldheadway@gmail.com. Emerald headway is the leading distributor of major bookstores in the Philippines.

  8. michelle says:

    Twlight movie is a very very good movie to watch. i love the whole story plus the actors and actresses are all gorgeous.

  9. Jenny says:

    oh i am so addicted to watching Twilight movie on my portable DVD player and laptop. Twilight is the best ever movie for me.

  10. Meams2 says:

    I cannot get enough of the movie Twilight. This is the best movie that i have ever watched. I love the chemistry between Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson –

  11. Seychelle says:

    Twilight is the best movie i ever watched. I really love the vampire love story theme and i like Bella Swans character.

  12. Kristiene says:

    Kristen Stewart is the perfect Bella .. All around the casting was perfect, everyone had so much so much angst that they fit the story perfectly

  13. Janice Yu says:

    Twlight is really a great movie and i watched it several times. I love Kristen Stewart and also the rest of the cast of Twilight, they are really superb.

  14. May Jaca says:

    i will watch every sequel of Twilight because i find this movie so good. the graphics is good, the cast is good and of course the storyline is great.

  15. Randall Vela says:

    i really love Twilight. this movie is super great that we watched it several times with some of my friends. `

  16. Ellie Hughes says:

    Kristen Stewart is really the best actress for the movie Twilight. I bet that Kristen and Robert Pattinson would also make a good couple. `

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  18. Amber Phillips says:

    Kristen Stewart got the looks and the talent to become an excellent Bella Swan in the Twilight movie. .~

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