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Plan your life, but never expect everything to happen.
My purrdy purrdy planner! :P

I started on this planner this year. It was a Starbucks Planner that I got courtesy of Lorenz (and his treasure chest of Starbucks GC’s. =p thanks a bunch, bes!). The need for such arose when I would constantly forget I have an assignment an hour before the class starts (which almost got my butt a few times already). I’m becoming really forgetful lately, that’s why I told myself I should organize my thoughts into a planner. It turned out, my thoughts (even if they were already written on the planner) are everywhere.

My planner, aside from keeping track of all my schedule, doubles as a diary/journal/blog or something to keep track of what happened in a day (so that I could go back to them if the need arises), and triples as a scrapbook (courtesy of all the pictres I post in its pages). So far the planner has been doing me well, although sometimes I tend to blabber which fills up the pages and makes it looks messy. No, wait, I love it messy. Hehe…

I posted this picture at the info page of my planner. When it was not yet filled, the empty space said “put your picture with your favorite starbucks drink here”. And so, I took a quick pic and it was perfect! =p

I have so many plans for my planner (wuhoo redundant). I hope I can do all of them before the year ends. That way, I can keep this memorabilia of mine in my treasure chest (and even sell it in the future if ever I become famous. Okay I’ll stop the daydreaming here. =p)

*Today was like a Harry Potter movie gone wrong. You paint a magnificent picture with your mind only to find out that almost everything was not what you expected them to be. It hurts, and it hurts more because you don’t know why it hurts. It hurts more because you can’t understand why it hurts. And it hurts more because you continue hurting even though you want to stop hurting and start caring. My fragile heart has become more fragile, to the point of being totally broken. Let’s not hope I die tonight of misery.

3 Responses to “Just Because”
  1. Anonymous says:

    This is exactly the reason why it hurts.

    “It hurts, and it hurts more because you don’t know why it hurts. It hurts more because you can’t understand why it hurts. And it hurts more because I continue hurting even though I want to stop hurting…”

    Does this feeling seem familiar? Yes! this situation happened to the both of us for about a year now for me or 7 months in your case. And this we felt to the people we love most.

    You have your reasons, I have my reflections. It has been your choice to tell everything to me those times. Now, I have my option to keep mine today.

    I’m sorry for not telling you the reasons behind what is happening to me/ to us all this time. I was afraid that I might break your heart over and over again. Maybe you’re right; I am beginning to be selfish. I am turning to be a monster that you never imagined I would be. But if this self centeredness means the capacity not to be hurt again, I would choose to have one for now.

    There is no better way than this. I’m so tired of being hurt. I ‘m tired of rejections. I’m tired of loving so much. You know these things. You know my capacity to love. You know my capacity to be hurt. You know my capability to be part of ones life. I have reached the limit of this friendship. Now I am afraid and preventing myself to go further the limit. I’ll rest for a while my friend. Continue this journey of friendship without me on your side. I’ll try to catch up. If I do, please weep again on my shoulders and embrace me like there will be no tomorrow… thank you friend.

  2. JM Tuazon says:

    In your shoulders, my friend, I wept real hard for the first time. I wept because of the fact that you’re my friend, and that you’re so important to me. Now that I am again weeping real hard, you are not by my side. And it hurts because you’re not here with me. It hurts. But I guess that’s how it’s supposed to be.

    If this is goodbye, then please let it be the sweetest goodbye I’ll ever have. So that when we do say goodbye, I’ll forever have a yearning to say hello to you again.

    I love you, my friend…

  3. Anonymous says:

    first doon sa itaas na subtitle, i remember this quote “Hope for the best, expect for the worst, life is a play, we are unrehearsed”

    second, doon na sa footnote :) why don’t you make time as your friend. mahirap maintindihan ang isang bagay when you are still immersed with its pain. it may sound to be masochistic, but live the pain as it is. remember that a life had been sacrificed for us, not only God’s but also our mothers. so expect that we need to have our own share of sacrifice for others also. to make the pain meaningful, offer the pain for somebody else’s welfare. and when all the pain have subsided, then you will find the reason why it happened.

    you two can decide to be friends or not. if you decide to be one, then expect that frictions will come. remember that polished stones become such after much grinding.

    manggary

    p.s. didn’t you notice the hippogriff and phoenix in narnia? hehehe

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